Gary Busey Swaps Wives With Preacher, Gets Burned at the Stake

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Gary Busey is an entertainer of the highest order. Irrefutable evidence of this comes in the form of my watching of an entire episode of Celebrity Wife Swap recently. I was caught in Gary Busey’s S-P-E-L-L — Special Powers of Entertainingly Loud Lunacy. 

Busey appeared in the second episode of the first season of Celebrity Wife Swap on ABC. The episode originally aired in January 2012, but unfortunately I missed that original airing. I caught the episode on some cable channel late one night last week.

I was in bed, flipping through channels in search of something mind-numbing to serve as the anesthetic I needed to drift into unconsciousness for the night.

Flip.

Flip.

Flip.

Wait. Was that Gary Busey?

Yep. It sure enough was.

Busey and Steffanie Sampson, his fiancee at the time, swapped with evangelist Ted Haggard and his wife Gayle.

Haggard was publicly shamed about a decade ago when a male prostitute alleged the preacher paid him not only for sex, but for crystal meth as well. Haggard’s Colorado Springs congregation of 14,000 essentially ran him out of town after the story became a hot topic for the media. His wife not only stayed with him, but she also wrote a book about the trying times the family faced, and how God pulled them through it all.

Busey is known for his spirituality, as is his hypnotherapist wife, but their idea of spirituality is far different than the Haggard’s. Gary and Steffanie claim they have lived 31 previous lives together. Gary claims he was a native American twice in his past, and he also believes he fought at the Alamo and was burned at the stake at least once.

I was hooked on this episode of Wife Swap the moment I saw Busey, sitting with his ass in the kitchen sink, look at Steffanie and say, “You know what’s good about farting in the sink?”

The Busey Whisperer, as Steffanie often calls herself, never let him answer his own question, which is probably the only let-down I experienced watching this train wreck of an episode.

Steffanie claimed the couple signed up for the wife swap, hoping it would be an opportunity to show the world Gary isn’t as crazy as people think.

“His brain works a certain way that not a lot of people can understand,” she said. That’s typically how I would describe someone who has a hard time keeping in touch with reality, but after watching the episode I came to the conclusion Steffanie appears to be playing ball on the same holodeck as her husband in spirituality. I’m just not sure which universe they’ve chosen for their home field.

Watching Steffanie go into the Haggard home with her off-beat views of spiritualism, and then watching Gayle Haggard deal with Gary Busey, is entertaining as hell.

I simply can’t do it justice. You just gotta watch it for yourself.

One thing that jumped out at me during the episode is the appearance of a big, native-American drum at Busey’s house. If I’m not mistaken, that is the same drum that made an appearance on the cult classic tv series, I’m With Busey.

Watch carefully, the drum goes by quickly in this clip.

Busey was still talking about writing a book of Buseyisms during Wife Swap, just as he did during his stint on Celebrity Apprentice, but that project has yet to come to fruition. He has, however, created Buseyism artwork that is currently for sale on his website.

Here are a few examples.

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buseyism_fart_large

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Busey explains how you too can create your own “isms.”

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